Even Paul Anka, F.O.D, HAS NOW COME UP WITH AN EXCUSE TO PULL OUT OF SINGING FOR TRUMP’S INAUGURATION

 

FOD (friend of Donald), 75-year old Paul Anka, is not too old or too dumb to keep having children in his Social Security years.  So, at an age when a normal person is trying to decide which blood-thinning miracle drug they should be on, Anka’s still playing Kramer vs. Kramer. This, of course, makes my hard work on new song lyrics for him pointless, irrelevant, and not nearly as funny.  It’s all about me, of course. Thanks, Paul. Via The Wrap:

Anka says that Trump is a long-time friend of his and personally invited him to perform at the inauguration gala ball at the Walter E. Washington Convention Center, where he would have perform “My Way” as Trump danced with his wife, Melania.  Instead, Anka had to cancel due to a scheduling change in an ongoing custody case for his son. Anka said that he had always been planning to perform on Jan. 20 “for the office and for our country.”  More here

He never backed out on Lisa Simpson….

Depending on your purient interest level, here’s Paul talking about life at home with the National Enquirer in 2009:

On Dec. 3, Anna Aberg, a sexy blonde fitness author who has been wed to Anka for only a year, called 911 from the couple’s Thousand Oaks, Calif., mansion during a domestic dispute.

Anna – author of The 30-Minute Pregnancy Workout Book – claimed Paul had pulled a gun on her during a heated argument about a member of their household staff.

Paul says he explained to police that he had moved out of the house and was living in a nearby hotel. But that on the day of the incident, he had gone to the home to take their young children to school. Paul and Anna began to argue about an employee she had fired, he says he explained to officers.

Paul told The ENQUIRER that he also placed a call to cops.

“Anna locked herself and the nanny in the laundry room and started screaming at the top of her lungs,” Paul revealed.

“Our kids were in the kitchen, hearing Anna scream, so they started freaking out crying. Anna went ballistic, she finally comes out and shoves me and then calls 911.”

When the cops arrived to the Anka home, they reported no visible injuries and no arrests were made.

This isn’t the first time the couple has had a run-in with the law. Last year, Anna, 38, was arrested for felony domestic battery after she threw a piece of ice at Paul, splitting his head open.

At the time, Paul refused to press charges and the matter was dropped.

Brad Gets The Last-Minute Phone Call To Rescue The Inauguration Of Donald J. Trump!

 

When I saw this headline my heart raced with excitement!

Great to see Paul Anka is still active. He asked me to help him with rewrites of his biggest hits and then I got a call from Lee Greenwood, too! Glad to help.

In addition to a special “F-U, Losers,” rewrite of “My Way,” “Diana” has been retooled.

“Ivanka”

“I’m so old and you’re so young
Thinking where to stick my tongue
I don’t care just what they say
‘Cause forever I will pray
You and I will be as free
As the birds up in the trees
Oh, please, stay by me, Ivanka

Because I’m old our days are few
Why’d you marry that slimy Jew?
Oh Ivanka, can’t you see
I love you with all my heart
And I hope we will never part
Oh, please, stay with me, Ivanka”

Particularly proud to help out old friend Lee Greenwood with his classic.

God HELP The USA

“If tomorrow all the lies he told
Didn’t win him the job as prez
He’d be stuck in that stupid tower
And Rachel Maddow’s still a lez

I’d have thunk my lucky stars
For the white trash working class
If their good sense would have seen
That the Con Man is an ass

And I’m proud to be an American
Where we used to sorta be free
Then V. Putin hacked and Comey backed
God Help The USA!”