What The Beck Happened In SC and NV? Drudge Fools Me AGAIN!

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Wow, was that ever shocking and confusing as I went to the world’s top compilation website for quality information about Saturday’s South Carolina and Nevada election results!  Seeing the first word of the headline and immediately thinking of that Scientologist singer guy who I really don’t pay much attention to who calls himself, “Beck.”…. imagine the shock when I clicked on the link and ended up here:

Glenn Beck Responds to South Carolina Primary Results: ‘Join Me’ in a ‘Fast for Ted Cruz’

Highlights if you’re too busy to click! “I would like to ask you to join me and my family Monday in a fast for Ted Cruz, our country and the Nevada caucus,” GLENN Beck wrote on his Facebook page after the South Carolina election results showed a decisive double-digit victory for Trump, whose candidacy GLENN Beck has been Screen shot 2016-02-21 at 4.14.40 PMstaunchly opposed to.   Ending what must have been a hellacious week for the Ted-loving Glenn, he’d already expressed his belief that God allowed Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia to die in order to “wake America up to how close we are to the loss of our freedom” and to the necessity of electing Cruz to name Scalia’s replacement… Beck also stated that “if the country is lost, it will be lost because of the Christians” who did not support Cruz.

Since it’s the Republicans’ turn in Nevada this week, I humbly suggest you don’t luxuriously anchor yourself in Las Vegas at the tony Wynn, where their fabulous buffet would make a Beckfast for Cruz nearly impossible.Screen shot 2016-02-21 at 4.26.32 PM

 

 

 

 

 

For Finicky Fasters I recommend the less appetizing Breakfast Buffet at Trump International Tower, which garners only 2 out of 5 stars on Yelp… you won’t want to eat!  But Sheldon Adelson’s place gets a thumbs up… Screen shot 2016-02-21 at 4.47.42 PM

That zany, whacky Drudge fooled me again with one of his deceptive headlines… and look where I ended up!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happiness is a Warm Gun carved from a 4.5 billion-year-old African meteorite…

You lucked out if you held back on buying winter clothing this Christmas because the weather was so warm.  You saved your money and now can step in there and bid on an eternal, practical gift for yourself.  An instant family heirloom/treasure that represents the very essence of our existence on Planet Earth.Screen shot 2015-12-29 at 10.04.52 AMThe firearm maker Cabot announced on December 16th that it would construct a set of extraterrestrial pistols made from a 4.5 billion-year-old meteorite that was first discovered in the sub-Saharan part of Africa in 1838. Iowa Republican evangelical voters, for instance, will have to choose between the literal interpretation of the Bible that says the earth is around 6000 years old and the gun company that is touting scientific “facts” that date the meteorite just a bit older.  In this case, you’ve got to go with Cabot.  The integrity of gun manufacturers and their lobbying arm, the NRA, towers over anything else… the Bible included.  That hurdle is settled.

 

From Cabot’s own PR release:  “It’s both romantic and fascinating to imagine that this meteor traveled across the heavens for four billion years before landing on Earth and is now being transformed into Cabot pistols,” states company president and founder Rob Bianchin.  Cabot will display a sampling of gun Screen shot 2015-12-29 at 10.10.08 AMcomponents made from meteorite at the SHOT Show in Las Vegas, the industry’s major trade show from Jan 19 to 22, 2016. The Big Bang Pistol Set will make their public debut during the NRA Annual Meeting and Convention in Louisville, KY, in May.

I’m not sure it could get any sexier than this as you add to your arsenal protecting you from Obama’s Confiscator Goonsquads and invading ISIS guys. You’ll feel so much better getting your brains blown out with this beauty than with a cheapo handgun…. if you order now we’ll send you a third SpaceAge Metal Monster free!  The luxurious storage cases have been meticulously fashioned out of wood harvested from the desks at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut where 20 kids and 6 adults gave their lives in 2012 defending our precious Second Amendment rights.  The cases are tastefully upholstered in authentically-bloodstained velour grabbed from seats in the Century 16 theater in Aurora, Colorado where just a few months earlier 12 brave movie-going souls also died in defense of gun rights.

Forbes.com reminds us  “A few years ago, another Cabot Guns pistol set, ‘The Left and the Right,’ featuring Barack Obama, George W. Bush, Piers Morgan, and Ted Nugent, made headlines.”

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