THE BIG NEWS: Sunday’s edition of The New York Times featured an article detailing how GOP bigwigs are FREAKING THE HELL OUT about Trump becoming the party’s nominee. Let’s unpack some of this
At a meeting of Republican governors the next morning, Paul R. LePage of Maine called for action. Seated at a long boardroom table at the Willard Hotel, he erupted in frustration over the state of the 2016 race, saying Mr. Trump’s nomination would deeply wound the Republican Party. Mr. LePage urged the governors to draft an open letter “to the people,” disavowing Mr. Trump and his divisive brand of politics.
The suggestion was not taken up. Since then, Mr. Trump has only gotten stronger, winning two more state contests and collecting the endorsement of Gov. Chris Christie of New Jersey
If you just read that and aren’t from Maine, you might not know that Paul LePage is an INSANE HUMAN BEING
Maine Gov. Paul LePage said Tuesday he made the “outrageous” comments about “black dealers” to get more Drug Enforcement Administration resources, alluding to past controversial comments he made about drug dealers.
“I had to go scream at the top of my lungs about black dealers coming in and doing the things that they’re doing to our state,” LePage told the radio station WVOM-FM. “I had to scream about guillotines and those types of things before they were embarrassed into giving us a handful of DEA agents.”
As the guy on the infomercial says, but wait: There’s more
Maine Gov. Paul LePage (R) believes asylum-seekers are the “biggest problem” in the state because of the diseases they may be bringing in.
“What happens is you get hepatitis C, tuberculosis, AIDS, HIV, the ‘ziki fly,’ all these other foreign type of diseases that find a way to our land,” LePage said during a town hall meeting Tuesday night, according to Maine Public Broadcasting News
In case you weren’t aware, there is no such thing as a Ziki Fly. However, if you start ranting like Paul LePage, you may have been stung by the deadly Dumbass Bee
But, you want to know how I know Paul LePage is out of his freaking mind?
(WAIT FOR IT! WAIT FOR IT!)
That’s right! After suggesting a resolution that would distance GOP governors from The Crazy World of Donald Trump, he decided to embrace him fully and completely. Suddenly, I long for the steady guiding hand of a Rod Blagojevich or Mark Sanford
Continuing with the Times piece
Republicans have ruefully acknowledged that they came to this dire pass in no small part because of their own passivity. There were ample opportunities to battle Mr. Trump earlier; more than one plan was drawn up only to be rejected. Rivals who attacked him early, like Rick Perry and Bobby Jindal, the former governors of Texas and Louisiana, received little backup and quickly faded
Despite the efforts of Rough and Ready Jindal and Blood and Guts Perry, The Donald’s truth is marching on. Seriously! Did people just watch them go into the breach and say “I’m sure those boys have this handled”? Dear Lord!
Resistance to Mr. Trump still runs deep. The party’s biggest benefactors remain totally opposed to him. At a recent presentation hosted by the billionaires Charles G. and David H. Koch, the country’s most prolific conservative donors, their political advisers characterized Mr. Trump’s record as utterly unacceptable, and highlighted his support for government-funded business subsidies and government-backed health care, according to people who attended.
But the Kochs, like Mr. Adelson, have shown no appetite to intervene directly in the primary with decisive force
Superman napped. I guess the guys are so anti-liberal that the mere thought that throwing money at a problem to solve it is deeply offensive to them
Several senior Republicans, including Mr. Romney, have made direct appeals to Mr. Kasich to gauge his willingness to stand down and allow the party to unify behind another candidate. But Mr. Kasich has told at least one person that his plan is to win the Ohio primary on March 15 and gather the party behind his campaign if Mr. Rubio loses in Florida, his home state, on the same day
I love ya, John, but, do you have a Plan D?
Mr. McConnell was especially vocal, describing Mr. Kasich’s persistence as irrational because he has no plausible path to the nomination, several senators said
I’d like to have just a word with big-time Republicans who think they can pull some shenanigans and keep Trump from the nomination. The rest of you can go back to surfing porn
Are they gone?
If you dummies start jacking with the delegates and working your behind-the-scenes magic, Donald Trump will mount a third party/independent bid, splitting the vote, and Hillary will waltz into 1600 (SHOCKER: He’s already laying the foundation)
While I admire your “The ‘check engine’ light is on. Let’s set the car on fire!” strategy, it’s hard to see a way out now. And, yes, you built that! Is it really that hard to see Nixon’s “Southern Strategy” morphing into white supremacists endorsing DT? Don’t you think if Lee Atwater had a Twitter account back in the day, it would resemble Trump’s feed now? Can you not see the link between making Rush Limbaugh an “honorary member of Congress” (“we need to sound like this guy”) to having a Republican frontrunner who sounds like a right-wing talk show host?
Good news for you, Repubs: Only about 25 seats in the House of Representatives are even going to be contested. What a fabulous credit to our democracy! Only about five percent of the seats up for grabs will see legitimate competition. Everyone else has been gerrymandered to safety except for the few seats where no one could be mustered to compete against an incumbent who would likely be able to spend the hell out of any challenger
So, that leaves the Senate? Hey, wait! Aren’t those the people who have the final say on Supreme Court nominees?
OK! Good talk. Glad we could share. Back to the Dump
Trump (hearts) Mussolini (apparently). The RT is not your friend, Donald. Here was Trump’s (weak) explanation on Meet The Press
Did The Donald diss Christie at a campaign event? You decide
Rubes and Cruzer continue to troll The Donald on tax returns
Meanwhile, Rubio is unleashing hell on Trump
When a protester appeared behind Rubio, sporting a coat hanger and a sign that read “MARCO RUBIO EMPTY SUIT,” the candidate wasted no time in vamping, quite effectively, on the interruption.
“‘Empty suit,'” Rubio remarked, clearly enjoying himself, “at least my suit wasn’t made in China!” — a not-so-subtle jab at Donald Trump’s clothing line. The crowd roared with approval.
“Ladies and gentlemen, the valedictorian of Trump University!” Rubio continued as the protester was led out
Good stuff, Senator. In fact, a little too good. A cynic might say the protester was a plant, which allowed Rubes to throw down his scripted lines
Stay thirsty, Marco